King David Vs. The Lizard People

King David stayed home from war.

That was his first mistake.

While the army is away, strange reports begin crawling into Jerusalem. Men are changing. Faces are splitting. Eyes are turning sideways. Tax collectors are growing claws, which only confirms what many people already suspected.

When a terrified messenger named Azriel bursts into the palace with news from the road towns, David expects fear, confusion, and several officials pretending they heard nothing. What he does not expect is a hidden enemy wearing human faces, a screaming goat that may be the kingdom's best detector of evil, and a cheerful explosives enthusiast named Uri who should probably not be trusted with pottery.

With most of his fighting men gone, David gathers a small crew and rides into the hills to find out what is really moving through the land. The mission quickly becomes a rolling disaster of lizard infiltrators, fire arrows, burning carts, exploding clay pots, suspicious smiles, and one goat named Trouble who seems far too comfortable with violence.

But under all the smoke and sarcasm, something darker is waiting.

The disclosure is not new.

The cover-up is not new.

And the lizard people have made one serious mistake.

They picked the wrong king.

King David Vs. The Lizard People is a fast, funny, action-packed pulp comedy novella packed with ancient monster madness, biblical satire, sarcastic heroes, explosive B-movie adventure, and a strange little truth hiding under the scales.